I felt really tired for this evocation, and as a result I spent a lot longer than usual focusing on the pentacle. It seemed to me this was the hardest doll for me to reach, most of the others I barely had to focus on the pentacle at all. I wondered why.
“You don’t remember my name.” said the Green Doll bluntly.
“No, I’m sorry, I don’t.” I confessed.
“That is a problem for you in making friends if you can’t even remember the name of your Love Magic doll, whom you named yourself. How do you think your potential friends feel when you don’t remember their names? You need to learn to pay attention to names.”
“This is true.” I admitted.
“You wondered why I looked melancholic. You speculated it was my paint, my sigils. You painted them at a time you didn’t know how to love. Every partner before Lolita you chose for sex, not love. And you left them just as you were coming to love them. You ran away from love. And so with your friends. In the past you chose friends for what you could get out of them and abandoned them for sex. To make friends you need to accept them how they are, not think what you can get out of them. If you follow that path you will end up with friends you deep down don’t accept and put yourself in danger. Don’t make friends hoping for sex. Don’t make friends to form a magical working group. Don’t make friends in order to score drugs. Make friends out of love. Prioritise love.”
“Thank you. I will. The red doll told me to ask you about allies, is this the right approach for that?”
“Yes. True allies come from friendships built on love.”
“One other thing, oh yes, the wedding, do you have anything to say about that?”
“Yes. That is your priority this year. Plan your wedding. Plan it carefully. Only make other plans once you know you have the resources left over. Everything else is secondary. Prioritise Love.”
I thanked the Green Doll and touched my head to the ground to earth myself. I feel like I am starting to get towards the end of my stamina in terms of magical energy, wondering how I will manage another evocation today. But I also know that I only have a few days left. The tiredness I feel is like that on a mountain climb, felt towards the middle of the descent. Most accidents happen on the way down, but I can make it, I just have to be careful and look after my needs.